Squirrel Wars Update

I think I won! I think I won! I think I won!  WoooooHooooo!

Nonsense, I'm not the least bit excited.

SAFFLOWER SEEDS!

I have seen the squirrel only once in the feeder, but it didn't stay long. Mostly I see where something has tried to beat the b'jeepers out of the feeder. The seed is still there, it's just scattered all over the place!

And, the birds don't seem to mind the safflower.

I may not have to file for bankruptcy after all!

Electrical and Electronics

I don’t know what’s going on with the planets, but one (or more) of them is messing up my life! I guess the gods in control of all things electric and electronic are grumpy. All this happened Sunday and Monday, November 17^th and 18^th if you care to chart this astrologically.

Coffee Maker

Sunday morning I proceeded to make my coffee as usual. The coffee maker did not want to cooperate. I pushed the button I always push and nothing happened. What? Not so early…don’t do this to me. I went so far as to pull out my old coffee pot. But, before I plugged it in, on a whim, I turned back to my coffee maker and pushed a different button. YES! There was coffee. The question being now: why didn’t the middle button work?

Just for the thrill of the adventure, with no K-cup in place, I pushed the middle button, and, of course, it worked…and has continued working.

Lights

Monday morning, my daughter, who was visiting, attempted to put the front hall light on and for whatever reason managed to disable the hall light and the outside light. There are two switches for those lights and I never use the one by the front door. My daughter did. I tried everything…played with the switches, changed the bulbs. I even checked the electric panel. Finally I gave up. I washed the fixture cover and made the decision to wait until my sons could look at it. At least the cover was clean.

Much later in the day, while I was making supper, without thinking, I hit the switch for the front hall light so I could see into the front hall closet. THE FREAKING LIGHT CAME ON! And the outside light!

Monday Washing Machine Blues

Load 1: no problem

Load 2: at the end of the cycle my clothes were still very wet. The timer knob was not where it was supposed to be. I did my best to find a spin cycle and got them less wet. I was ready to call appliance repair.

Load 3: decided to let ‘er rip…just to see what would happen! Would you believe load 3 went through without a hitch? 

Load 4: I had to run another load just to be sure Load 3 wasn’t an anomaly. Load 4 went through flawlessly.

It’s wasn’t over.

Food Saver

After lunch I took a small loaf of gluten free bread out of the fridge to vacuum seal and put in the freezer until my daughter comes back at Christmas time. The darned vacuum sucker upper wouldn’t suck up. I cannot deal with this right now.

But, There’s hope

The coffee pot, lights, and washing machine all self-corrected. I have great hopes for the Food Saver.

Oh! And you better believe I made sure the Time Machine automatic back up software was running in case my computer decided to join in!

Follow-up To Squirrel Wars

Squirrels won.

I gave in and bought a new feeder. One that has spring loaded tray doors that will close under too much weight so squirrels or heavy birds can't get at the seeds.

The new feeder, as you can see is double sided and I can see how much seed is in it. The old feeder is now hanging under the deck where the Fuschia plant hung all summer. I think I'll leave the original feeder under the deck, that way the heavier birds like blue jays or mourning doves can still feed.

AND I'm sure the squirrels will climb the post holding up the deck and jump into the feeder. So be it. It will be stocked with the cheapest seed I can find. So there! 

My War on Squirrels!

Before moving into this condo, I lived in a house. I fed the birds...and the squirrels. It became war! One year I had to deal with "robo" squirrel. It was bigger than your average squirrel, and able to hang upside down over the tray and eat all it wanted without touching the perch (which would have closed the door to the seeds). I went to war with a water gun. Squirrel won. Grrrrr!

The first winter here at the condo, I had other things to think about, so did not feed the birds. The second winter, last year, I fed them from feeders hanging off my deck railing...15 ft. or so off the ground. Because the feeders were hanging up high and from metal rods, the squirrels seemed to be discouraged.

This year, I want to be able to watch the birds from my basement family room where I spend most of my time. My plant hangers are now bird feeder hangers...seed, suet, thistle. And the seed feeder has become the place for the squirrels to camp out while gorging themselves at my expense. This is war!

My oldest granddaughter made the seed feeder for me when she was in high school, so I really want to use it. Each section has the name of one of my grandchildren and her name is on top. If I can't find a solution to the squirrel problem, I'll have to replace it with the weight sensitive perch type feeder.

POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS

1) A hot sauce/water/dish washing liquid combination to spray on the feeder and seeds. Don't use chili powder...it clogs the sprayer. Guess how I know that? My squirrels apparently love hot sauce. I suspect a squirrel wrote the recipe. And furthermore, squirrels must have written all the information that stated birds were not bothered by the hot stuff, too. It’s cold today and not one bird has visited the feeder. Haven’t seen any squirrels yet, either, but that doesn’t mean anything…yet.

2) Wrap the poles with duct tape...sticky side out. I did that late yesterday afternoon so it's too early to tell if that will deter them.

Here is a poem I wrote about my encounter with Robo-Squirrel:

Grey Marauder / Damn Squirrel
This poem has two titles. Depending on your gentility or sensitivity you can choose the one you like.
I will use GM/DS.

Velvety pointed ears

adorable face

fluffy tail hugging his back.

Please        don’t remind me it’s a rodent.

Hanging from the clothesline,

latest in bird feeders

guaranteed to close under the weight

of a squirrel or two mourning doves.

Works perfectly.

Then GM/DS showed up.

Born with long hind legs he learned

to drape over the edge of the feeder

help himself to seeds

without dropping the door.

Apparition of insanity,

I would fling myself out the door

Screaming        clapping my hands

attempting to frighten the GM/DS.

He ignored me.

Not sure about the neighbors.

Problem-solving Inspiration

suggested I needed

artillery       this was war.

Weapon of choice

a brightly colored water gun

two quart capacity

with pump-priming action.

Laying in wait, my heart pounded.

There he was.

I slithered through the patio door

took aim        FIRED.

Shoulda seen that soggy sucker go.

Never touched the ground ‘til

he reached the other side of the woods.

But,

his need to raid the feeder

was greater than his fear

of a blast of cold water.

Cost me a bloody fortune in bird seed.

I faced this winter with dread.

How big is he now        how many

has he taught over the summer?

I wait       and wait        and wait.

Water gun, cheap plastic, seizes up

requires my hysterical attention.

He never comes.

The street quiet.

Did my neighbors trap this critter

send him to someone else’s town

just to be rid of the screaming, flapping,

water shooting antics of the

crazy lady next door?

Damn squirrel.

Beverly R. Titus

12/24/06